What a strange situation I find myself in. Usually, I jump at the chance to try new things, especially food. But what I find before me today does not smell, look or in anyway seem like something delicious. Where are the petals? Where is the fresh dandelion smell? And there’s no green. Doesn’t food usually have some type of green in it? They’re called Rocky Mountain Oysters and I guess you’re supposed to eat them.
I have heard about them. I have seen them. I have heard people telling Fred to try them. Still, there is something not quite right about these Rocky Mountain Oysters.
So far, my only lead are the other people who talk about them. I have been invited to something called the Testy Festy. From what I’ve been able to find out, it’s a festival that celebrates bulls balls. Needless to say, the next time I get an invite to that party, I am definitely going to show up. Everyone knows I have the biggest bulls balls around, so no festival that celebrates them is really complete without me there. What I don’t get, is how they are linking bulls balls and the oysters from Rocky Mountain.
As far as I know, oysters come from under the water, near beaches and you have to dive for them. I guess that means somewhere in the Rocky Mountains is a big body of water that must have a lot of oysters. I mean, they have so many that it can dredge up enough to feed people at festivals all year around. See, I heard about this other Festival called the Rocky Mountain Oyster Feed. I think Fred got an invite to this one and talked about trying to get there next year. Apparently, there are tons more all over the place.
If I go to enough of them, I bet I can find out what the link is between oysters and these festivals. When I do, maybe I can get Fred to make a t-shirt about it.